Monday, December 19, 2016

Stronger than yesterday

Tears fall down her cheeks;
caz you hit a sensitive place in her heart;
she is fragile in many ways; she never says no if you may ask:
she loves big and she hurt herself big; It's her in many ways you see;
She cares for you so much and she dreams of you big;
She appreciates you and she is fascinated by you;
She feels right when she is with you..
Weak is not the word to call those tears that run through her cheeks;
She has lived and survived those tears since she was a kid;
That is how she let go of her pain;
That is how she stands tall and strong today;
They soak her cheeks, they mess her make up;
They swell her eyes and makes her look weak (in your eyes);
I wish you knew the strong woman in her;
and how she lets go of everything that hurts her;
she will cry rivers of tears when you hurt her;
she will cry herself to sleep when she is hurt;
that is all she knows of letting go; caz no one has stood by her to wipe them away;
So may be you should stop; stop judging her - for the tears that fall down her cheeks;
She ain't weak- that is all she knows;
May be its you who can show her- that the world can be without tears any more:
May be its you who gives her that confidence - being strong no longer requires tears;
May be its you she is looking up to - to draw that strength she sees in you:
May be she is stronger in herself when you hold her tight and show her the world..
May be you are her "stronger than yesterday" flame!

Monday, November 7, 2016

Puddles of Joy !


Roads of trial and moments of pain..
Leading to one big dream; that I must say;
Trees and birds and waterfalls;
Was candy to my eyes; wherever I stay.
 
Among all ordinary, fairy tales they say;
Heaven fell on earth is upon I gazed;
Strange faces and hellos amaze;
Lighting up a fire within ablaze.
 
Believe in luck or chance or fate;
A smile is what you brought to my face;
Common but uncommon and full of grace;
Through me - saw that amazing gaze.
 
Trees and birds seemed so tiny - you were around;
Even Sambas seem so dear - you were around;
Puddles of joy wet my feet - you were around;
Tickle in my heart and mind so on -you were around.
 
So;
 
Shy eyes - stare at me while am here;
Good vibes - spread them upon me dear;
Coincidence - keep happening forever near;
Magical - keep doing what you do so dear!

Monday, September 12, 2016

What is worth is the journey and not the destination - Summiting Lakegala


If someone asks you the best way to conquer your fears, different people might have different methods from not wanting to face it to face it straight up. Lakegala climb was my ultimate way to face my fear of heights. Having being in to hiking for months, this was at a point where it was a part of my life that I came across the hike to Lakegala.

 Lakegala is considered the toughest mountain in Sri Lanka to summit for many reasons. Situated near the border of Kandy and Matale districts, this mountain is known in the history as the place where Kind Rawana met his queen Sita and as the place where he lifted his famous air plane “ Dhandumonara “. After the death of the recent mountaineer in 2014 in a summit attempt, this was banned for any mountaineers due to the severe risk involved in climbing.

The summit includes an approximate 4 hour steep hike and then a 150m rock climbing of about 80 degrees steep followed by a 0.25 km hike among bushes with thorns. The portion of rock climbing has to be done very carefully with the high amounts of wind gushing as well. One slip of your foot could mean the end of your life. Why take that risk?

 For me, personally, the only way I get over my fears is by facing them and I decided that I will be taking up this challenge. Out of a group of about 30, only about 12 summited and the journey to the top and way back down was the most adventurous 28 hours I have spent in my life.

 Journey began around 8.30 AM from the village home we stayed overnight and by the time we reached the last place where we could get water it was around noon. We did not expect a difficult climb until the start of the rock climb from that point but we definitely underestimated. It was such a steep climb of about 2 hours and by the time we reached the bottom of the rock, our water exhausted. It was around 3 PM. Few people already have given up climbing the rest after looking at the same. My heart pounded but I knew I had to do this and I knew I would not go back without summiting the same. Baby steps side-ways and upwards to a point where I can without a rope and with the help of awesome human beings who were complete strangers.

 Then comes the harness and the climbing device and here I slowly start the climb. Wind gushes through, I slip on and off, but I made progress. After a tiring half an hour which was relatively slow than most others, I made it to the top of the rock around 6 PM. Little did I realize that it will be dark soon and we will be stranded. All I knew was that I had to make it to the top. Bare feet ( because I removed my shoes for the climb and the person who had them tied was nowhere to be found ), I scroll the forest with bushes and thorns. I feel the pain of bare feet cutting but all I knew was that it was getting closer.


Voila! I made it.

 Apparently the first time ladies have summited the mountain ( wish I can add that to my CV but it might not count as client value J )

 On the way down, I had to look for my shoes because I wouldn’t have survived in a mountain at that time without it. It was dark and getting darker. And it didn’t take myself ten minutes to realize that I was lost right on top of the most dangerous mountain without shoes and with no light. Dehydrated from not having water for the last 4 hours, I didn’t know what I was doing. Myself and the other guy who came with me to find my shoes decided to keep hooting to get others to find us. Finally, one person found us!

 It was a nerve wrecking journey from that point to the top of the rock because we literally couldn’t see anything in a rock that was closed for climbers because of a death. I should say that I felt nothing but secure with a bunch of guys (mind you! I mean male species who are always misunderstood ) who were strangers. One with his hand tied to my t shirt so I won’t fall off and others giving their shoulders and knees for me to support, they were nothing but guardians when I was in need. So for anyone who’d think you are not safe among unknown men, please make a note that there are men who would protect you more than their life when a need arises.
We finally made it to the top of the rock! Next challenge was the wind. It was 10 PM and here we are ten people right on the edge of a steep rock fall, hugging each other to not keep ourselves frozen. We were out of food and water for almost 9 hours by this time. We knew we had to make it down – at least a few to make room for another three more who were right on top still facing heavy winds.


We decided to get one guy to back me up and for me to go down. It was 11 PM. Darkness doesn’t have a definition neither did the wind. We couldn’t see where we were stepping. I was told to give my weight to the person who was backing me up to go down. My swollen, wounded bare feet were trying hard to have the best grip possible. We slipped and was blown by the wind few times. Knocked ourselves on the very rock where another man died by slipping. All I knew at that moment was that I was facing my worst fear in the worst possible way!

But there was so much calmness around. It was as if I was ready for anything at that point. I did not scream or utter a word every time the wind swept us away. Instead I was ensuring my back up that it was OK. Our descend took more than 40 minutes but we made room for the rest of them to stay safely on the top. We reached the bottom after struggling with a rope that was tangled on the way, wind that swept us, feet that were torn but we made it. Spent the night covering our heads and arms in our own t shirts.

Never did I dream that I would spend an uncalled night on top of the most dangerous mountain in this little island but we survived. After 18 hours of dehydration and a body that didn’t know what balance was, we descended in the morning which took us way longer than it should have. For everyone who summited, this definitely would have been the most adventurous without any doubt.

And for me – I don’t know if I should say that I am scared of heights anymore because what I conquered was definitely more than one fear

I look back today and I realize that all of us have that one big dream. All of us plan to get there – time it, find resources, revise it. But somewhere down the line, we all have times that we have got it all wrong. We have torn feet, we have slipped feet, we have winds blowing us away from the main path. We meet strangers who help us and friends who ditch us. You have the choice to be the one who gives it up half way or you can be the one who makes it all the way.

You will have days where you literally would have no hope, days where you feel peaceful and calm. You will be tired , dehydrated and unbalanced. But remember as long as you keep moving, you will get there. When you reach there and when you look back, it’s not the destination that will resonate in your mind but the journey you took !

Never make the journey a shortcut because it’s the journey that teaches you the best lessons in life !

So that is me summiting Lakegala ! Beautiful , Inspiring, adventurous and Achieved !

Saturday, February 13, 2016

I see you blush :)

Hello there..
New level of creepiness taking me there;
supposedly to cheer me up;
A chaotic , busy life it was; here pops up my chill pill !
You were the definition of simplicity in my eyes;
Times ain't easy to feel good in being you; but you?
you just do it with so much of ease..
Who'd knew such little was needed; to catch me off guard..
Years of building walls; years of rejecting love;
years of rejecting closeness; may be I see an end?

It seems miles apart - well it is miles apart; seems so impossible;
Yet my heart yearns for the feeling; that I seem to dearly miss.

Warmth is when you wrap me up in your arms so tight;
Caring is when you clean my mess;
Hope is when you look right in to me;
Peace is when your fingers entangle in mine;
Fondness is how you see me as who I am;
Craziness is roaming the streets at night;
Honesty is sharing without judgement;
Completeness is what makes me write these lines..

Something whispers that you are special; worth going that extra mile.
Even if that means counting days; to see you one more time.
Distance makes hearts grow fonder; hope ours will grow with time.

Hey you, the precious one ( yes I see you blush );
this call is out to you..
to build that home, that is just mine !!


Friday, January 22, 2016

When I called you, My Friend!


In a sky full of stars, you seemed to shine so bright;
When trusting someone was so difficult, 
you seem to show me a way for some goodness;
At least I thought (that seems more appropriate)!
I called you my FRIEND! (mind you not a lot get called that way)
Some times you challenged my belief;
I thought you were so fake!
But the voice within me said, trust until you are deceived;
So here I go, trusting the newly met FRIEND !
What I didn't know was that you had a life that was broken that you try to mend;
And that life didn't have room for a faithful friend.
Don't know yet what it is,
that you were so embarrassed about..
Certain things you made me do, I barely did for the most closest to my heart;
But the way you made me feel empty, got no words to explain!
You were a coward, who couldn't step closer to me;
Who couldn't just appreciate my time I spent on you, yes JUST on you !
All you could do was stare and call me;
and you were just steps away !!
Was it embarrassment? Wasn't I good enough? 
Or was I chasing away your other options? (caz no one would think I am just a friend)
Breaking my heart was not what you did, let me tell you when I find a word for what you did!
So here's me walking away...
Well trust is a difficult thing, and one day you asked me why I am I so hard?
Why my heart is so toughen up?
Well, you now have an answer..
It is caz of people like you, who keeps on breaking the heart,
When I called you, MY FRIEND !